Saying goodbye to weed and my best friend

2021.09.20 07:42 healthfreedom4all Saying goodbye to weed and my best friend

Today I am 5 days sober. I have smoked weed for over 25 years and tried to quit a handful of times. Every single time I stop smoking, my brain decides to tell me I can smoke again and this time will be different. It is never different, and I keep repeating the same cycle which ends up with me smoking everyday from sunrise to bedtime. On average I was smoking an ounce a week, give or take for years.
I can not live the life I want while I am high because it makes me paranoid and gives me anxiety. I would consider myself a functioning addict because smoking weed never made me lazy, I just don't accomplish much because I'm paralyzed by anxiety.
I met my best friend when I was 20, (I am 37 now) and we spent almost all our time together getting high. He is of the mindset that smoking weed improves his life and thinks I am crazy for giving it up. Since I have been able to stop smoking in the past, (the longest was 261 days) he feels like I have some super strong will power and always tells me "you can smoke again, just don't smoke as much" or "you've already shown yourself you can stop whenever you want to, why not just get high." Meanwhile, he has never had a sober day in the last 17 years of our friendship, so he has no idea the withdrawal that occurs when you quit this plant.
I recently started a new job and quit smoking again. I'm starting to realize there isn't much substance to our friendship, and in fact, he makes it harder for me when I really want to smoke and he tells me to just pack a bowl. I've tried to explain to him about the night sweats, insomnia, vivid dreams (I actually scream for help in my sleep!), headaches, the rage and all the other things that happen in the first few weeks after quitting, and how when he tells me those things it makes it harder for me, but it falls on deaf ears.
I can't do this anymore. I love and care about him, but I need some support in my life right now, and it's very clear that he is not going to be that support. I don't care he still smokes, I just need him to not try and encourage me to smoke. How many times are you supposed to tell others how to treat you before you find your boundaries and choose yourself?
Has this happened to anyone? Does anyone have any recommendations or advice? Should I just move on with my life and close the chapter on this friendship? Going back to smoking is not an option for me.
Sorry for the long post. I can't sleep because all I can think about is how shitty this situation is. I'm sad because I feel like I am giving up two things. 😞
TLDR: I quit smoking weed and my best friend keeps trying to encourage me to smoke. Weighing my options on keeping him as a friend or saying goodbye forever.
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2021.09.20 07:42 etay080 [H] Fall VR Bundle [W] PayPal

House Flipper VR Until You Fall Paper Beast Wands
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2021.09.20 07:42 david-codm A more advanced default look. (Concept)

A more advanced default look. (Concept) submitted by david-codm to CallOfDutyMobile [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 Avethegamer Hey guys, I'm Avethegamer14. Writer of Sol-Ridge and Luciana. I write these books on Webnovol. Anyways AMA

Yeah hey guys its me, Avethegamer14 or also known as Avery Harrison. If you guys haven't read the things I call books then go read it on Webnovel. Anyways for those who have I wanted to do a AMA. So if you guys have question or hell even comments about my writing go ahead. I always love and looking for ways to write better. Please be respectful. Also if you haven't read the books don't be shy to ask questions.
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2021.09.20 07:42 bazaartimesco Chinese version of TikTok limits use of app by those under 14

Chinese version of TikTok limits use of app by those under 14 submitted by bazaartimesco to bazaartimes [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 Adam-best Beauty Mixed Mini Lithops - 200 SEEDS Cultivating Difficulty Degree: Very Easy Use: Indoor Plants Flowerpot: Excluded Classification: Novel Plant Function: Beautifying Applicable Constellation: Pisces Model Number: Succulent Style: Perennial Location: Courtyard Climate: Temperate Type: Succulent

Beauty Mixed Mini Lithops - 200 SEEDS Cultivating Difficulty Degree: Very Easy Use: Indoor Plants Flowerpot: Excluded Classification: Novel Plant Function: Beautifying Applicable Constellation: Pisces Model Number: Succulent Style: Perennial Location: Courtyard Climate: Temperate Type: Succulent submitted by Adam-best to BestDealsOfTheDay_ [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 bazaartimesco Honda targets annual sales of 70,000 Prologue electric vehicles in U.S. from 2024

Honda targets annual sales of 70,000 Prologue electric vehicles in U.S. from 2024 submitted by bazaartimesco to bazaartimes [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 boxmandude My latest cop.

My latest cop. submitted by boxmandude to yeezys [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 Intoxicatedalien Is there limit to num communities subscribed?

I’m at around 100 subscriptions.
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2021.09.20 07:42 michaels_hoodie Pokemon nickname glitched in red?

I'm playing a nuzlocke on my red virtual console and something weird happened to my Doduo. If I remember right, I caught them on the route by Fushia with Wrap and Glare from my arbok and named them Upanova. I caught a Ditto, Snorlax, and Nidorino after that, then lost my Blastoise to a juggler in the gym.
I deposited my Blastoise in the box for my dead pokemon and went to get a new teammate. I notice Upanova is now nicknamed 'UpanovaHunter', Hunter being the name of my rival. I withdrew them and the game's text says I withdrew 'UpanovaHunterL'. I have no idea where the L came from. Their stat screen has the name UpanovaHunt with an e wrapping around by Doduo's sprite (rL might be behind sprite idk)
The nicknames of the Pokemon I caught before and after seem fine. I healed, deposited, and withdrew the Doduo again, but the name glitch seems permanent. I don't know what happened, I haven't been activating any glitches, at least not on purpose.
Is UpanovaHunterL going to be okay? If I try to transfer them up to a newer game will it fail? Does anyone know how this could've happened?
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2021.09.20 07:42 Thwomp69 I fucked up and lost some of my closest friends on what was supposed to be the best night of my life.

for context im 16m and my friends are around the same age. I was at homecoming at my school after winning a big football game. This happened last night.
It all started as one of the best nights of my life. My football team is ranked #2 in the state and we just won our big homecoming game. We were all in full party mode. It was on the field after the game when I met up with my friends. We all celebrated on the field and we did the same in the locker room. Eventually we all went to the homecoming area of the school in the courtyard. I got there late as I had to drive out to get some cash to pay to get in.
Also for more context ill give out a list of my friends with fake names T(closest friend)(16m) B(Closest friend's little brother)(14m) G(Closest friend's older cousin)(20m) R(Closest friend's little cousin)(15m)
Yes, they are all apart of the same family and i considered them my brothers and my second family. We expressed love for eachother we were that close. That makes it extra painful.
Anyways, in there it's packed. smoke was forming in the air due to everbodies body heat on the dance floor. I immediately went to find one of my friends. I ended up finding T. immediately after I ended up meeting with the whole group, except for B.
We all got together and went on the dance floor and we got at it. Even though I was exausted from the football game I still danced like there was no tomorrow. I was still in party mode and was just wanting to enjoy myself this night with my brothas. Everything was going well and eventually I noticed B on the dance floor. At one point something weird happened though. I put my hands on T's shoulders and yelled Conga and then R grabbed my shoulders and we had a little conga line. R whispered something in my ear then. "B got dumped, pass it on to T." I was so confused and just said no. He kept asking the me to pass it on until he grabbed the back of my neck on some sort of pressure point and I finally just yelled it out of pain and just to get him to shut up and let go. I didn't really know what the deal was with that, but I carried on like nothing happened because after all, I was just there to have a good time.
I continued to dance and even talked to a few girls that were cute and I was really enjoying myself. Oddly, I noticed my all my friends seemed to be less hyped up. I tried to get next to them and dance but they just seemed annoyed with me. I thought nothing of it and just carried on with other people. Eventually the dance was almost over and the last song on was party rock anthem. I was beginning to think all my friends were just out of it until that song came on and we all went into the croud together and danced our butts off. After that we all agreed to meet together at the gas station down the road.
I was in the parking lot at the school on snapchat when T called me from the gas station parking lot to come over there. I put the truck in drive and was there in like less than a minute. I see them outside and holler at them before walking in after them. They all went into the bathroom and I followed behind them. It was all just chill as we were just washing up and getting our business done. G and B walk out first and then right before I leave, T asks to talk to me. I ask him what's up and he asks me a question that confused me. BTW: R was in there too with T and I.
He asked me, "Why did you say that out loud" I was confused and said "say what out loud"? T seemed very dumbfounded with me not knowing what I had said out loud. I genuinely had no idea. Then T mentions when I had yelled out "B got dumped". I asked him what about it and he told me something that hit me hard. Turns out B actually got dumped. My dumbass just though R was just being an ass and making something up when he said it to me. I immediately felt awful. He the asked me if I noticed B sobbing in the bathroom stall in the school bathroom during hoco and I didn't know. He then asked if I noticed him crying on his friend's shoulder and I also never noticed that.
It all hit me at the point. They weren't just exausted from dancing or just losing the spirit. They were fucking pissed at me. I had just hurt B really bad without realising it. I wanted to throw up. T was beyond furious with me and made it clear that he wanted to kick my teeth in. If he did I wouldn't have blamed him one bit. I deserved it. He couldn't believe that I didn't notice any of the signs. I don't even know how I didn't notice. R started chipping in too, but he was just talking shit and even said something about me being Hellen Keller with how I didn't notice.
I apologized to T with all I had but he told me I needed to apologize to B too and I knew I had to. Next thing you know B walks in with G. I see B and I realised he looks terrible. His eyes were red and puffy. He started walking towards me and I was ready to do what I could to make it up with him, but he grabbed my hair and yanked my head down and started punching my head and my back. I didn't do anything to fight back. I just took it while saying "I deserve this". He threw about 10 punches and stormed out with G. I got up and I just looked at T and R. I don't even remember what I said, but at that point I was holding back tears. I never felt that terrible in my life. I think we just said bye to eachother and we walked out. I walked to my truck but T asked to keep talking. We went behind my truck by ourselves and talked a little more about it. I just kept apologizing and told him I never noticed it and that I felt like a complete dick. He said he knew, but I don't think he really cared. I honestly wouldn't if I was him either. I hurt his brother in a way I can't imagine. B has had it rough lately, but when I met him on the football field after the game he seemed genuinely excited for this night. I fucking ruined it though.
The rest of my friends swung by in G's car and T went off with them. I climbed in my truck and just sat there. I stared at my steering wheel and just thought to myself. At that point I was just ready to let it all out but I guess my dry eyes from my worn out contact lenses stopped that. Pretty much to sum up that night I called my last close friend who wasn't there and isn't apart of T's family. I told him everything and thankfully he listened to me. I started talking about how I wanted to just stay in the gas station parking lot all night and I didn't want to go home. by that point I had been there for about half an hour and it was already midnight. I then asked if I could maybe bunk at his place for the night. He then came up with the idea to come to me. I ended up driving over to him anyways as he was prepared to walk all the way over to me. We just drove around and talked about the situation and other fuckups in life and other sad shit. We also talked about good times though. I drove us through all my favorite back roads I use to clear my mind. At the end we went back to the gas station for drinks and then I dropped him back off at his house. I was beyond thankful for him being with me. I think he saved me that night. I ended up returning home too.
I felt a little better that night but I did admit to him that I would probably need to get drunk to cope with that night. Luckily though I got home too tired to even touch the alcohol. I still haven't as I write this. I used to have a drinking problem that I had ended less than half a year ago. But now I lay here and I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should wait it out, Try to get a hold of B, or get T to talk to B. I don't know what I should do. I already miss them and at this point im willing to do anything to make it up to them. Especially to B.
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2021.09.20 07:42 MrDankForest11 Are Splitgate, Halo Infinite, and BF2042 gonna kill this game?

I’ve seen a lot of apex players saying that at least one these three is gonna kill apex due to the server issues recently
Should we expect to see the player base dwindle when BF/Halo release? Also, what makes Splitgate so good that people are switching to that?
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2021.09.20 07:42 Barnes_the_Noble After a year of quitting I finally beat the game.

After a year of quitting I finally beat the game. submitted by Barnes_the_Noble to Sekiro [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 joocecool (Selling) G.I.Joe 1, 2, downsizing, Billy Lynn’s long halftime wark

G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra 4k - 6$
G.I. Joe: Retaliation 4k - 6$
(G.I.Joe Both 10$)
Downsizing 4k - 5$
Billy Lynn’s long halftime wark 4k - 5$
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2021.09.20 07:42 holly_lightly Outside Craig Montana this evening

Outside Craig Montana this evening submitted by holly_lightly to Montana [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 MightyMaus1944 Custom Item

I've made a lot of homebrew content for my SW5E campaign. Most of it is legendary artifacts, and most of those are real-world firearms. However, the simplest things are sometimes the best. Here is one of my players' favorite items I have made. I created this after a short discussion with my players about how putting the collapsible stock modification didn't make sense for pistols as they have no stock normally. Furthermore, this item simplifies the benefits of both the collapsible stock and holster items into one item. If you guys like it, I might share the other stuff I have created.
Concealed Carry Holster, Enhanced Item, Standard rarity.
This holster is specially designed to carry smaller blasters covertly. It can accommodate all pistols and any blaster with the light property. You can draw the stored blaster without using your object interaction. Replacing the blaster requires an action. Additionally, the stored blaster gains the hidden property.
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2021.09.20 07:42 Claude_Depussy My heart 🥺

My heart 🥺 submitted by Claude_Depussy to RATS [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 lBreadl Diamond/Special came for unlocking all gold guns

Basically what the title says. There should be a special camo you unlock for every weapon once you get all gold weapons. Like how CoD has diamond for unlocking all gold, but preferably something cooler than diamond.
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2021.09.20 07:42 ukixyzzz Can I lose 2-3kgs of weight by doing 30min jump rope in 25 days

F15 and I weigh 60kgs
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2021.09.20 07:42 aqua_zesty_man Add Ravager Lairs as a Deep Dark-only structure.

They could be generated like Dungeons--a cube or cuboid surrounded by cobbled deepslate, with one entrance that opens out to a Deep Dark noise cave. Inside would be one or two feral Ravagers (no spawner boxes).
Your reward for clearing the Ravager lair would be or two barrels buried in the floor of the lair, using their own loot tables that would be appropriate to a wild animal who likes to collect things: bones, rotten flesh, shiny things, and so on.
(If bundles could be placed as blocks in the world I would suggest those instead.)
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2021.09.20 07:42 CaptainBananahandler Another day dawns on the Odmeyndud Water Settlement.

Another day dawns on the Odmeyndud Water Settlement. submitted by CaptainBananahandler to NoMansSkyTheGame [link] [comments]

2021.09.20 07:42 summonedornot Psychotherapy & feeling shame

I have been seeing a psychotherapist for a year now. I have improved a lot in the past year or so, but lately, they have been focusing on the abuse in our sessions. I realize I should probably gall with them about it but whenever I try, I feel so much shame and anguish I cannot speak. I am considering discounting therapy because I feel unable to talk or think about it. Does anyone have any advice on how to be more open with a therapist? Thank you
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2021.09.20 07:42 KajaawaToursandCabs Explore Shillong

Explore Shillong The ease of travel restrictions in Shillong and elsewhere means that this is a perfect time to plan your holiday and explore Shillong. So take this opportunity to relax, refresh, and rejuvenate in Shillong's natural surroundings.
We recommend that you spend some time in Shillong to overcome any negative feelings you may have during lockdown times. If you want to visit Shillong call Kajaawa Tours and Cabs for the cheapest cab service.
Read more:
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2021.09.20 07:42 footfetishloverxxx Can someone broadminded pls DM me NOWWW

Can someone broadminded pls DM me NOWWW submitted by footfetishloverxxx to FootFetishExperiences [link] [comments]